By Foteini Lioliou,
One commonly held view is that nowadays everyone has a big ego and no one is willing to put it aside. In other words, few people are able to admit that they did something wrong or that they are responsible for something terrible that happened. Even if that is the case, the question is: how can we change it? How can we learn to put our egos aside and make peace with one another?
It is honestly one of the most difficult things to ever do. People never want to admit that they are wrong about something. They always try to convince others but mostly themselves that they are not the ones at fault. That is mainly due to the fact that they hold this idea for themselves that they are better than others or they know better than others. They always vision themselves as perfect little human beings that have no flaws and they are free to judge others’ mistakes but never their own (if they even acknowledge the fact that they make mistakes). As a result, they do not let go of their ego but most importantly they do not let themselves grow.
Growing is essentially the act of improving your behavior and becoming the best version of yourself. When you fail to admit that you are wrong, you also fail to understand that there are parts of you that require improvement. The words you speak and the way you behave are not ideal sometimes, especially toward other people.
Most times, people fight with one another because of the disagreements they have and they usually do not comprehend what they did wrong. Not to mention that some of them never make peace with the person they got into a fight with. This means that they choose not to speak to each other ever again rather than put their egos aside and actually find a common ground, a solution.
Letting go of your ego is one of the most valuable lessons. In order to do that, you must learn how to respect your partner’s thoughts, ideas, and opinions. The next step that you need to follow is one of the hardest. You have to accept that you are also a person with weaknesses and you can make mistakes like everybody else. Once you acknowledge that you have flaws and that you are allowed to make mistakes, you will be able to create and be in healthy and happy relationships with people and yourself. The final step is to apologize. Being apologetic does not mean that you are weak and wrong.
On the contrary, it depicts that you are making an effort to fix any problems or issues. You are making an effort to save your relationship with people because you love them and appreciate them deeply. You want to make peace with them because you would rather lose the argument than lose them. Once I have read that in an argument, it is not you versus the other person but you (both) versus the problem. Therefore, if you want to keep the people that you love and cherish in your life, you should learn how to accept that you are not always right. In addition, you must learn that taking the blame and apologizing is necessary if you truly want to end a quarrel but also grow.
Overall, accepting you are wrong and apologizing for it makes you the bigger person. This act will help you bring peace to your relationship and to your inner self, too. It is not who took the responsibility but who tried to move past the dispute.
- This is why you should put your ego aside to grow. projectwednesday.org. Available here
- Put your ego aside for the sake of peace. aish.com. Available here