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ΑρχικήEnglish EditionSophie Turner: Τhe best example of a "bad mother" the patriarchy was...

Sophie Turner: Τhe best example of a “bad mother” the patriarchy was looking for


By Evridiki Fatolia,

Sophie Turner and Joe Jonas are getting a divorce, this is now clear and confirmed by the former couple’s joint announcement. The actress and the musician were married four years ago, they had two children together and now decided to walk in separate streets. As is often the case, their joint announcement confirming their divorce is an example of civilized separation. But in the world’s media, along with official announcements, there is a campaign to devalue Sophie Turner and target her as a “bad mother” that is impossible to ignore. “After four wonderful years of marriage, we decided together and on a friendly level to get a divorce. There are various speculations about why we’re separating but it’s true that this is a joint decision and we sincerely hope that everyone will respect our desire for privacy for us and our children,” Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner wrote in a post posted on social media.

Sophie Turner and Joe Jonas are getting a divorce, this is now clear and confirmed by the joint announcement of the former couple. The actress and the musician were married four years ago, they had two children together and now decided to walk in separate streets. As is often the case, their joint announcement confirming their divorce is an example of civilized separation. However, in the media around the world, along with the official announcements, there is a campaign of underestimating Sophie Turner and targeting her as a “bad mother” that is impossible to ignore. 

“After four wonderful years of marriage, we decided together and on a friendly level to get a divorce. There are various speculations about why we’re separating but it’s true that this is a joint decision and we sincerely hope that everyone will respect our desire for privacy for us and our children,” Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner wrote in a post posted on social media. 

The famous – formerly – couple married in 2019 at a spontaneous ceremony in Las Vegas after the Billboard Music Awards. In July 2020, Sophie Turner gave birth to their daughter, Willa, and their second daughter, whose name has not been known, was born just fourteen months ago. In the divorce application filed by Joe Jonas and handed over to American People, their marriage is described as “irreparably dissolved”. 

Sophie Turner. Image Source: Hindustan Times. ©Getty Images

And let us come to the “various speculations” mentioned in the joint statement of the actor and the singer. Media such as TMZ, citing various anonymous sources from the former couple’s environment, have presented Sophie Turner as someone who “likes parties” highlighting her opposition to Joe Jonas who “loves to stay at home. They have very different lifestyles.” 

In Page Six the article refers to Sophie Turner’s exit entitled “Downloads bars” (according to the publication she was at a party with her colleagues from a new TV series). While anonymous sources told The Daily Mail in an article talking about Sophie Turner’s “Wild Night with Ticks” that she “became famous very young, then married and had children very young and never spent the years sleeping with each other and spending carelessly having fun with her friends”. And all this happens, even though both Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner described the latter as the one she loves to stay at home all these years. 

A woman who drinks a drink after work is already “news” and if she is a mother and this is used to convince people that her need to work and have fun makes her bad in her role as a mother. Social media clearly sees Joe Jonas’ public relations team behind these news and identifies the contradiction. For years just the fact that Sophie Turner was described as cool in the media benefited his public image, giving him the character of an equally cool pop star. In 2020 Sophie turner adorned the cover of Elle and the title was “Sophie Turner is the chill best friend you always wanted”. She talked about her relationship with Joe Jonas and said that their first date was at a notorious bar where Joe “drunk as much as my company”. This was her image and he on her side (when they became a couple she was the protagonist of Game of Thrones and clearly more famous than him) earned coolness points. 

What changed after that? She became a mom and they got divorced. And he, according to social media, is exploiting the patriarchal stereotypes that accompany the role of the mother against her. According to foreign media, he is a mature, good dad, who takes care of his children as long as his immature mom takes them away without tomorrow. What proves the way foreign media cover the divorce of Sophie Turner and Joe Jonas is that even in 2023 women cannot have fun without being judged for it. Without it eventually gaining a negative tone. Because I think if it was Joe Jonas that the tabloids would find drinking with his colleagues in a bar, they would at most write that he’s upset and trying to manage his divorce. Or if sources from his environment told the same media that he likes parties, this would be considered a normal part of his lifestyle as a musician.

©David Crotty / Getty Images

It’s not only for Sophie Turner that enjoyment is portrayed negatively. According to a 2019 Worcester Polytechnic Institute research, both men and women regard women who drink alcohol as “less people.” Even today, women are subjected to harsher judgement than males when it comes to drinking. Despite the fact that males are four times more likely than women to be alcoholics, women account for the vast majority of alcohol-related deaths each year. 

According to the American People, the reason Sophie Turner is away from her children these days – and she has every right to have fun if she wants to – is because she is filming the Joan series in England. “She works the kids to be with him because he has more help at home and on the tour than his family.” “It’s something they both agreed on,” a source told People. As a result, Sophie Turner is being chastised for spending time away from her children. As a result, she portrays herself as a less-than-ideal mother. And this is a good example of mother shaming and misogynism. Excellent pairing. Even if this is the case, if Sophie Turner enjoys going out with her co-workers after work and “dropping bushes,” why is this a bad thing if she has first taken care of her children or if she does it when this care has been taken over by their father, with whom she shares the same obligations and rights? What’s the problem with this? 

Nothing, it’s the correct response, but to articulate it and stop hunting for the parties responsible for Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner’s divorce, we must acknowledge that women have the right to have pleasure even after they have children. By holding them in their arms, they do not lose all other elements of their existence at once. That their identification does not instantly become unambiguous. That people have the right to live their lives as they see fit. That they have the same rights as men. 


References
  • Wong, B. (2023) Claims that Sophie Turner is a ‘bad mom’ and doesn’t fool anyone – especially Working Moms, HuffPost. Available here
  • Smith, R. (2023) The internet is taking sides in the matter of Jonas vs. Turner-and, for once, it’s right, Vogue. Available here 
  • Why is mum-shaming still a thing in 2023? is it because society still won’t let women fully express themselves? | Rhiannon Lucy Cosslett (2023) The Guardian. Available here

 

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Evridiki Fatolia
Evridiki Fatolia
She was born in 2000. She graduated from the Law School of the Aristotle University of Thessaloniki in 2022 and is currently pursuing her LLM at the University of Reading in the field of International Commercial Law combined with Intellectual Property and Management. She speaks English and Italian and is also learning Chinese, German, and Russian. Her hobbies are photography and hiking.